Life with Kids and Traveling with them too!

You know those days where you wake up and your inner self is telling you “just stay in bed?”  Well my inner self was screaming that at me today….but unfortunately, somebody had to take my daughter to preschool, so I had to ignore my inner self and go on with my day.  My morning got off a little rocky and my daugher arrived 5 minutes late to preschool.  She was quick in letting me know that she did not approve of being late.  When we reached her room and the class activities were in full gear, she quickly looked at me and said, “Mommy, you made me late for school today.” I quickly looked down at her realizing that I completely forgot to have her brush her teeth.  I than looked at my son with his breakfast still visible on his cheeks and chin.  I quickly said to her, “I know sweet pea, but the fact that we made it at all today is something to be proud of.”  Not knowing what I meant, she gave me a kiss goodbye and on she went to class.  With hope that my day would improve,  my son and I headed back home.  While my son was napping, I proceeded to call customers to confirm their various orders for baby equipment.  While on the phone with one customer, I begin to cough uncontrollably (I’m still recuperating from the flu).   All the coughing made me get a pounding headache.  The kind of headache that doesn’t seem to go away no matter how many Excedrins you take.  A few hours later and with my headache still in tow, my son and I were off for a lunch date.  I was looking forward to seeing an old friend that I hadn’t seen in over a year.  I just knew it was the “pick me up” I needed.  When I got to the restaurant there was no available parking up front, so I had to park in the “money required to park here” lot behind the restaurant.  I only had a $100 bill in my wallet (normally I have no cash, but this was left over from our Hawaii trip).  I asked the parking attendant if he could break a $100.  “Frank” ( I later learned his name), informed me that it was company policy not to accept bills larger than a $50.  I than explained to him that it was all I had & that I would go into the restaurant, get change, and bring it back to him.  He wasn’t going for it. ”Frank” is a stickler for his “company” rules.  I let him in on the fact that I had my “infant” son in the back seat, I was late for a lunch date, and I promised that I would give him his $5, if he would just let me park.  I thought for sure when he heard I had my son in the back that he would show some compassion and let me through.  Nope, in fact he said to me,  “Lady, if you had a monkey in the back, that still wouldn’t matter to me and I still wouldn’t let you in the parking lot!”  I mean, can you believe this guy?  I asked him what my options were and what I could do.  (Not that calmly though….I’m pissed, obviously).   He told me (in his own words), “Go to a damn bank! I don’t care, but you ain’t getting in my parking lot with a $100 bill!”  I then asked him for his name……okay, not quite.  First I yelled some expletives at him and then I asked him for his name.  With a smirk on his face he offered to give me the company’s phone number.  Normally I pride myself that I do not “stoop down” to such a level.  In fact, I teach my daughter all the time about God’s Golden Rule and that sometimes people are not nice but we may not know what kind of life they have, so we should just be nice in return.  Maybe it was my headache….maybe it was me having a rotten day…..it doesn’t matter….I should practice what I preach.  The fact that I used language that I rarely ever use (really) and reacted to this man in the exact manner he expected, is unacceptable.  How would he have reacted if I had said, “Thank you sir for being so understanding.  I appreciate you assisting me in this manner” and drove off?  I can imagine he would have been completely dumbfounded and probably felt on his own (without me having to yell it at him) that he was a jerk.  And perhaps he would have been a little nicer the next time a mom or anyone else for that matter came to his window.  So, I am not proud of my actions today….even though, in my opinion, he completely deserved it.  I told my husband the story and he followed up with a phone call to the company.  I doubt anything will come of the incident.  Afterall, Frank did follow company procedure and although he was completely rude and nasty to me, he didn’t break any laws.  And as unpleasant as the incident was for me, it did make me realize that its easy to be rude and nasty to people, what truly takes skill, is showing your children how “calm and respectable” you can be in these types of situations.  “Treat people how you want to be treated”, thats God’s Golden Rule.  It’s not “Treat people how they treat you.” It sounds like I need to do a little more practicing on following the rules…….

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Okay, so how many people do you know with this kind of luck?  Our first trip, ever, without the kids.  It’s only our second day in Maui and we’ve caught the flu!  And not just one of us…no, that’s not our style.  We both caught the flu!  I haven’t had the flu since high school….now in my 30’s, let me say this, IT”S NOT FUN.  In case you need a recap, here’s what it feels like:  Your entire body aches from head to toe.  You feel like a bulldozer was laying on top of you for hours and you can not move.  Your eyes feel like they will pop out of your head at any minute because they are so hot.  The room won’t stop spinning.  You think your husband is laying next to you saying he feels terrible, but you are not even sure.  He could be the bell boy for all you know.  Day 3 and 4 went by very slowly for us.  We spent them in complete darkness in our room.  I can tell you the color of grout on the tile floor in the bathroom and probably many other details of our room.  Meanwhile, outside our room, we could hear children laughing, splashes in the pool, music playing down below……all while we lay in our bed unshowered for 2 days in complete misery.  We probably would have stayed in bed another day, but we had booked horseback riding at the Mendez Ranch.  Already we had missed massages that we had scheduled and we were determined to not the let the last few days of our vacation go to hell…although we probably just should of done just that.  Once you book activities you have only 24 hours to cancel….we of course didn’t even have the energy to pick up the phone…so horseback riding it was!  With all our medication, kleenex, cough drops in tow, we headed for our adventure.  The horseback riding was well……As my luck would have it, I was given a female horse named “Capone”.  The cowboys at Mendez Ranch failed to warn me that my horse liked to eat grass while on the trail and in order to make up time for her constant grazing and to catch up with the rest of the group - she would trot.  Yes, trot.  So, if you can imagine this, I would get a gentle ride for about 2-3 minutes or so, than followed by a 30 second trot.  This went on for 2 hours.  I, of course, am holding on for dear life, while my husband is amused by my constant jiggling up and down (as he watches from behind).  My husband, of course, had the docile, easygoing, horse named Roxy.  That’s the one thing you can always count on me for — a good laugh.  If you know me at all….I’m something of a clumsy person.  So, me on a trotting horse….we’ll you get the idea.  Needless to say, the horseback riding consumed my energy that day.  We also had a zipline tour planned for the next day.  Ziplining is where you zip across a wire very high in the air.   I realized if I barely had the energy to make it through with a trotting horse, there was no way I could manage a zip line - so we cancelled.  The rest of our trip is barely memorable.  It was a lot of kleenex and nyquil.  We somehow managed to make it back home and are still recovering.  We did get a “pick-me-up” when we got home - our kids, of course.  It was nice to know that we were missed.  Our kids did wonderful their first time away from us.  My husband and I on the other hand, well, we could use some practice.  We laugh now thinking about our trip.  It didn’t quite go as we had hoped, but it was definitely “memorable”.  And that’s what trips are all about, making memories.  I don’t think we’ll be taking any trips alone in the very near future - we’ll opt for our family vacations.  There is nothing wrong with having alone time - we just prefer our time to be family time.

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On our first day in Maui, we were sight-seeing, shopping, and planning our activities for the week.  In fact we were doing everything we should be doing on our Maui vacation.  Heck, we even had Mai Tai’s at 2:00 p.m. just because we could!   And our resort was absolutely fabulous!  (Marriott’s Ocean Club Resort.)  The room we stayed in had two bedrooms and a sleeper sofa in each room…..it was more than enough room for two.  Perhaps that was why we felt like something was missing.  With all this room, we felt a little guilty that our little ones weren’t there with us soaking in the views and having fun!  And as if our own guilt wasn’t enough, the resort had plenty of reminders that we were staying in a “kid-friendly” place.  They had a pirate ship swimming pool for the kids, a playground area, and a list of activities for those families traveling with children……..geez, our kids would have had a blast, bring on the guilt!  We tried to remind ourselves that we needed this alone time.  We couldn’t remember the last time we had “real” time to have adult conversation.  So, we reassured ourselves that we were going to come out more patient, more refreshed, and therefore, better parents at the end of this trip, so on with our vacation we went!  Conversation was a little difficult at times….the kids always seemed to come up in our conversation one way or another.  In fact, we made a bet that we would not mention the kids for the rest of our trip and that worked…..for about one whole hour!  We finally faced what we always knew…our kids were our life.  We didn’t know who we were without them and we didn’t want to know.  We gave in and called home.  We expected to hear, “Mommy/Daddy when you coming home?  We miss you!”.  Instead, we called and found both kids laughing and having a ball with the grandparents.  We should have been pleased, but instead, found ourselves a little envious that we weren’t the ones causing those giggles.  We finally went to bed, a little “homesick” with thoughts that we were missing the nightly baths, bedtime stories, and bedtime kisses with our little ones.  One day in Maui down….five more to go…..

The next day we awoke with the determination that we were still “fun” people, even without the kids.  We were in Maui darn it & we were determined to have fun, no matter what!  What a better way to have fun than to do some whale watching?  I have never been whale watching before, and let me say, it is by the far one of the best experiences I have ever had!  For the two hours that we were on the boat, I completely forgot my world and was completely mesmerized by the beauty of the humpback whales.  We were lucky enough to see some of the whales (including a baby) breaching out of the water about 3 feet away from our boat.  There is no other way to describe it except to say it was completely magnificent!  I will admit, I wished my daugher (4) could have seen it too.  I just know she would have loved it and truly appreciated it…….again with the guilt.   Day 2 was wonderful and our “homesick” had subsided a little bit and we begin to truly feel that Maui was just what the doctor ordered for us…this was going to be good.  And then we both started to cough……

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To pass the time during our 6 hour flight we brought books, our Ipod, even some cheesy magazines!  To be able to read without the distraction of kids to contend with, well, was something we hadn’t done in a very, very long time.  Okay, we get the occasional time when the kids are napping or those trips to the “lieu”, but to have a devoted 6 hours to reading….well, that’s unheard of! We were “gitty” on the flight as we talked about how wonderful it was to be “hands free” (no kids in our hands).  We could actually even have a cocktail on the flight if we wanted too!  I’m not much of a drinker, but the thought that I could have one just “because” was almost enough to entice me.  However, I chose not too as I wanted to remember my arrival to Maui and didn’t want my husband to have to carry me off the plane. (I never drink so it hits me easy.)  After about 1 hour of enjoying our solitude, we started to say, “I wonder what the kids are up to?” or “I bet right now they are having breakfast.”  One question led to another and then another, and before we knew it we were already missing them!  We then reassured ourselves that they were FINE and we needed to enjoy ourselves and relax.  We then proceeded to pass the time by any means we could.  We snacked, watched the on-flight movie, talked, slept……geez, how long was 6 hours anyway?  Finally…..we arrived and were in Maui!!!  We expected the same feelings we had last time….the butterflies, the excitement……..but when we arrived we had none of that.  Not that Maui still wasn’t beautiful…..there is no argument there, but something was missing……..we didn’t have the butterflies…..not much excitement……what was missing?  “Our Kids”, was my first thought, but I didn’t dare say it aloud.  Instead I looked at my husband and said as cheerfully as I could, “This is gonna be great.  I’m excited.  Let’s get going!”  And with a half-hearted smile he said, “Yeah, you’re right.”  And we were off……..

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It had been over 5 years since my husband and I had taken a “real” vacation.  When I am referring to “real” vacation, I am not referring to the trips to  New Mexico to see family or the weekend getaways, or the trips to Disneyland.   I am referring to a no kids, adults only, more than a weekend vacation.  A “real” vacation.  Don’t get me wrong, we love traveling with our kids….there have been no trips without them since they were born!  We were planning a Hawaii trip and were looking forward to it.  We went back and forth:  to take the kids, to not take the kids?  Everyone we talked to said the same thing:  “You need your alone time.”  While we agreed with them, we also didn’t want to be without our kids and we just knew they would have so much fun!  So, it was decided that this was going to be a ‘family vacation”….and so the plans began.  However, after our son’s first plane ride (see previous blog), a six hour plane ride just didn’t sound like a vacation any longer, so we opted to take our very first “mommy and daddy” trip.  Yup, “mommy and daddy” trip……alone, no kids.  My husband and I agreed that we could use some time alone to reconnect and reenergize.  We were married 9 years before we had kids, so we definitely had our share of fun times ”pre-kids”, but we knew the vacation would be good for everyone.  Once the decision was made, I would often find myself daydreaming beforehand on how I was going to fill some of my time with pure nothingness.  That’s right……nothingness.  To be able to wake up when I felt like it, take a shower when I felt like, eat when I felt like it, etc. etc. sounded like heaven to me!   I mean, I couldn’t even imagine not having to eat at 5:00 p.m. with all the Senior Citizens……just to eat dinner “whenever” was enough to get the adrenaline pumping!!  Oh, and not to mention doing “nothing” while getting a tan - that was a big plus! People would often ask if I was sad, worried, etc. to be “leaving the kids”.  While I was a little bit saddened,  (did I mention this is the first time without them?), I would quickly shrug this off because I knew they were going to be in very capable and loving hands (their grandparents) and our daughter (4) was ecstatic at the thought of someone “new” to take care of her.  We knew she would be fine without us and she would help to entertain our son (11 months) — who usually seems oblivious to the rest of us as long as his sister is in the room.  We figured they could probably use a break from us too.  So, off we were to Hawaii!  We said our goodbyes and with only 2 suitcases in hand (this is what it feels like to travel light) we were excited and ready to explore the island of Maui!  It had been about 7 years since we were last there…..so we were anxious to marvel at its beauty once again…..and to have some much needed R and R time……

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I belong to a Baby Equipment Rental forum & we share ideas, tips, etc. for promoting our baby equiment rental businesses.  I have learned many good insights and helpful tips on ways we can be a better company and provide better services to our customers.  One recent, hot topic of discussion has been that of having pictures of family (children) on the web.  Many flee from the idea & say they just won’t do it.  Others say they feel they live in a safe area, so why not?  I find that I frequently teeter-totter between both ends….here’s why:  First & foremost, I love my kids and I love taking pictures of them. In fact, one of my favorite beloved hobbies is photography.  I’m an amateur to say the least, but I have the best subjects around.  I enjoy sharing my pictures with other people.  What’s the point in taking great pictures if you have no one to share them with?  On the other hand, because I LOVE my kids so much, I want them to be as safe as possible.  Unfortunately, in the world today, there is so much craziness out there that you always have to be on guard!  (Especially, with the technology of computers today.)  So, here is where I find my balance:  I do have pictures of my kids on the web, but I do my best to protect their identity.  I always know who my kids are with and where they are at all times.  Their safety is of the upmost importance to me.  I teach my kids from an early age (started at 2) about the importance of being safe.  I don’t think its ever to early to start this — we do not want to scare our children, but we certainly want them to know that not everyone out there is “nice”.  I will likely continue to post and share my photos.  It’s a personal choice, but I also know that I am taking all the precautions that I can to protect my children.

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My 11 month old will soon be one.  At the end of this month to be exact.  I am both excited and saddened at the same time for my little boy to turn the “Big 1″.  Excited because he will be going through so many changes in the next upcoming year.  I look forward to seeing this little person “develop” and experience so many things for the first time.   The years just seemed to fly by once my daughter turned one…..so I wish I could slow down time   and keep him an Infant just a little bit longer.   Thus, why I feel just a little bit saddened.  Turning one is such a milestone.  I have enjoyed him being my baby soooo very much that I know soon enough (its already started) he’ll want to break free from my arms so that he can go out and explore.  All moms have their favorite stages.  For some its the newborn stage, for some its the infant stage, for others its the toddlerhood stage.  While I don’t enjoy the newborn stage as much (it’s a lot of work!), I do enjoy my baby being “my baby”.  I’m not ready for him to be a big boy just yet!  Seeing as how they haven’t invented a machine to allow me to stop time, I guess I’ll just have to grin and bear it.  So, rather than focus on what’s coming up ahead, I’m going to sit and enjoy “today”.  “Today” my baby boy gives me the biggest smile when I get him from his crib…..its the most remarkable smile.  And that’s a smile I hope to see into adulthood……now, that’s something to look forward to.

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Many of our friends have said to us that they don’t enjoy going out to dinner with their kids because it’s just too much work!  Our family goes out to dinner at least two times per week (sometimes more) and I have often been asked what we do to our kids to make them behave and allow us to have an enjoyable dinner.  As much as I would love to say it’s just great parenting - that wouldn’t be the complete truth.  What works for our kids is that we always have a “plan”.  For instance, our kids are 4 years and 11 months, and they both get hungry by 5:30 - 6:00 p.m.  Push them later than this and you are just asking for trouble.  So, we always strive to be in a restaurant and ordering by 5:30 so that we are eating by 6:00.  Also, I keep plenty of snacks, toys, and other things in my diaper bag to keep them busy until the food comes.   Our son has taken a liking to apples because he is teething.  So, we’ll take an apple, peel & core it and let him “gnaw” away.  We also try to feed him first so that when our food comes, we can eat & he can continue to “gnaw” on his apple.  This can keep him busy long enough for us to enjoy our food!  My daughter is 4, so as long as she is engaged in conversation and has a cracker or two to hold her over until the food comes, she is pretty content.  I’ve found that the times we were unprepared (no snacks, eating late) our meal time was stressful and hectic!  We’ve learned that if we want to have an enjoyable evening  than we need to take the extra time to prepare.  We are proof that you don’t have to wait until your kids are 10 to take them out to dinner.  Just pay attention at home to what items or foods hold your child’s attention:  a particular snack?  a particular toy?  your keys?  Sometimes giving them something new to experience , like a straw (with your supervision of course), will also entertain them.  My daughter loves to organize the sugar packs on the table and often times my son will be entertained by watching her.  We definitely are not experts when it comes to kids, but we’ve tried and tested what works for us.   We hope that all of you will have many pleasant dining experiences to come!  It’s enjoyable to get out of the routine sometimes and it shows your children there is a whole other world out there and good manners are expected.  Happy Dining!

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You may not think of hiking when you think of the desert, but Palm Springs is surrounded by the beautiful San Jacinto and Santa Rosa Mountains.  We have some wonderful hiking trails, that you parents will enjoy because you get a fantastic workout, while enjoying the beautiful scenery.  The kids will enjoy it because they feel like they are on an adventure!

We also have the essential hiking necessity for those of you with children weighing under 45 pounds…..the Kelty Kids backpack.  It allows your little ones to be raised above your head so that they can enjoy the beautiful scenery too!  We’ve tried other backpacks and we haven’t found any that compare to the Kelty, which is why we only use Kelty for our business.   We used the Kelty with our daughter and now we use it with our son.  With both of our children, they never fussed while they were in the backpack and as a family we are able to have a relaxing stress-free time.

If you decide to go hiking while you are here, I would recommend the Indian Canyons (www.theindiancanyons.com) located in Palm Springs.  Bring a picnic with you as there are many shaded spots to sit, eat, and enjoy the view!  If you want a true “desert” hike, than I would recommend Joshua Tree National Park (www.joshua.tree.national-park.com) located in Twentynine Palms (about 40 miles from Palm Springs). 

Be adventurous and take the whole family out for a hike!  You’ll be glad that you did.

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Okay, so you pack up the kids and head to Palm Springs…….now what?  Well, we may not be known as a “kid-friendly” place, but that’s changing as more and more families begin to make the Palm Springs Area their home! 

If you are lucky enough to visit the Palm Springs Area in December or January - you are in for a treat at The Living Desert in Palm Desert.  For those of you who don’t know what The Living Desert is, it’s a wildlife and botanical park that has all sorts of interesting animals, including our favorite - giraffes!  You can find out more information at www.livingdesert.org.  If you plan on visiting The Living Desert while you are here, please be sure to bring plenty of water for yourself and your little ones (especially during the summer months), snacks for the kids, your walking shoes, and your camera!  They have a spot where the kids can brush the goats and sheep, so you don’t want to miss those Kodak moments. And a plus for us parents - you can skip the stroller!  The Living Desert has ’strollers” available for your use with a suggested donation of $3.  (Please note: their strollers are not well equipped for infants).

And if you happen to be visiting in December through January 1st - pat yourself on the back.  You get to see the Wild Lights!  It’s an absolutely amazing display of christmas lights throughout the park. You can take a stroll as you sip on some hot chocolate and take plenty of pictures!  It gets a wee bit chilly in the evenings, so please be sure to dress warmly (jackets and all!).  Rumor has it, in December, Santa himself visits the park & takes time to allow for plenty of pictures with your cuties! 

Our family frequents the park a few times a year and the kids never grow tired of it!  We especially enjoy The Wild Lights.  This year we decided to celebrate New Year’s Eve at the park and we had a blast! 

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